I love Jesus. I love America.

I love Jesus.  I love America.

And the two are not an intrinsic conflict.  Both statements are and can be true at the same time without logical dissonance.  And until somewhat recently, most folks would have never questioned that both statements could be true at the same time.  But alas, that does not seem to be the case so much these days.

Christians have long used apologetics to state the Supremacy of Christ, to articulate our personal, collective and universal need for a Savior, and to extrapolate various aspects of Christian doctrine vs. doctrines of any other religion, most primarily the other 4 of the big 5 – Judaism, Islam, Hinduism and Buddhism.  I doubt that I can add anything here to the great thinkers of the past.  Beyond that, of the two loves I mention, Jesus is by far the One with no identity crisis, the One fully capable of defending Himself, and is these traits eternally – past, present and future, as much as those terms can be applied to an ever-present eternity.  So do not infer that I love one more than the other by virtue of the fact that I spend more apologetic energy explaining why I love America in the following lines.  That would be a false conclusion.  Nay, I write here on my love for America, because she is under attack, not from an external enemy, but from an internal one.  One whose tactics are based on lies perpetuated by emotion, intimidation by mob rule, and self-righteousness in the name of caring that cloaks a heart of fear and fear mongering. 

Those are big statements for this preamble, but before I break each one down, I must remind myself of the definition of love as patient, kind, not envious, not boastful, not proud but humble.  It is not rude, self-seeking or easily angered and keeps no record of wrongs.  It does not delight in evil but rejoices in the truth – even hard truth.  It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, and always perseveres.  My prayer is that my choice of words and phrasing below pass the above tests.  And where they do not, I pray the Spirit’s conviction to correct.  And just so we are clear – if my word choices offend you personally or make you feel uncomfortable that does not automatically mean they were not loving words or truthful yet hard words to read.  Personal offence or lack of comfort does not make my words hateful.  One of the tests of the strength of love in any relationship is the ability to disagree – even strongly – yet remain in the loving relationship.

With these thoughts in mind, how do I defend my love and concern for America?  Who is this internal enemy?  Or perhaps that is better asked who are these internal enemies?  Rather than call out names which will likely prove divisive and cause you, my reader, to stop lending me your mind’s ear, I will instead offer questions to consider and ask yourself as you listen and observe various messages be they verbal or action.  I would argue that any message that leads to a “No” answer to these questions may – and I did say may and not is – be from an internal enemy of America.

·        Does this message strengthen the US Constitution?

·        Does this message build up and edify America and Americans?

·        Does this message exude respect for America and Americans?

·        Does this message extend grace to flawed people, past or present, who still accomplished good and great things at possibly great personal sacrifice?

·        Does this message lead to liberty, religious freedom, and self-government that is beneficial to all of society?

·        Is this message coming from a position of facts and truth instead of fear and emotion?

·        Is this message logically sound?  Does it stand up to scrutiny?

·       Does this message lead to respect for the source rather than fear of the source?

·       Does this message strengthen the voice of the weakest among us?

If the answers to the above questions are generally a “No”, then that begs the question: what is the goal of the message?  Is the goal a continuation of the God-given gifts of freedom and liberty and self-government without the burden of tyranny that prompted the American Revolution in the first place?  Or does the goal seem more sinister?  I see far too many messages these days that don’t pass the inherent tests within the above questions.

And it breaks my heart.

It breaks my heart for my grandchildren.  Will they know the America I have known and loved and been proud to call home lo these 50+ years?

It breaks my heart to wonder if I will simply tell them someday what it was like to be free and not ruled by the elite in the government, but that there truly was a time when government was of the people, by the people and for the people.  Those were not just words in a history book, but they mattered.

It breaks my heart for the sacrifices of so many – millions of sacrifices – who gave their lives to keep alive and pass on the promissory note of freedom.

It breaks my heart for those whose livelihood sends them out in the front lives to protect others but who are condemned, abused and even ambushed, all too often losing their very lives.

It breaks my heart for their families, wondering each day if their spouse or parent will come home.

It breaks my heart for those who feel like they have no voice simply because their message isn’t loud enough.  Or because their voice has been hijacked by others who are louder or more sensational.

And now where do I go from here?  Yes, back to my opening statement.  I love Jesus.  I love America.  Jesus is perfect, yet many, including myself, struggle to love Him with 100% sincerity and from a pure heart.  America isn’t perfect.  She never has been, and she never will be.  But that does not mean she needs to be transformed as to be almost unrecognizable. 

If we lose her – her call to live free, her call to pursue life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness, her call to personal responsibility with compassion, her call to justice under the law, her call to be a City set on a Hill, her call to join the expansion of freedom from tyranny everywhere – if we lose her, she will not be easily revived.  The loss will be great to not only all Americans but to the whole world.

I am but one voice, and I have almost no influence in this life, even among family and friends.  But this one small voice will say to my dying day:  I love Jesus.  I love America.

Am I a “real” Christian?

Am I a “real” Christian?  This may sound like a crazy question to ask, but I have been thinking about that question for at least the last couple of years.  Not because I’m having a deep crisis of faith, but because of things I see on social media.  Let me try to explain.

Am I a “real” Christian?  Some people would answer a firm “Yes!” to this question, based almost solely on my political leanings.  Because in this case, I agree with their political leanings, which we know to be how God leans.

Am I a “real” Christian?  Some people would answer a firm “No way!” or at least a “Doubtful”, based almost solely on my political leanings.  Because in this case, I don’t agree with their political leanings, which we know to be how God leans.

How can both viewpoints be true at the same time?

Political beliefs seem to be a bit of a litmus test of whether a person is a “real” Christian or not these days.  And if we disagree with our friends, then we feel empowered to show them "what for" by continuing to convince them our political persuasion MUST be right or barring that, defriend them.

Really loving isn’t it?

So love.  Where is the love?  Remember this quote?

Love one another.  As I have loved you, so you must love one another.  By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another. ~ Jesus

Political memes.  News articles shared because they present “truth” – or at least OUR truth, so it MUST be truth.  Those really speak love, right?  Love for everyone, fellow believers as well as those who don’t believe like us, right?  

Or how about mercy?  That’s another one of the big tenants of Christianity. 

Be merciful, just as your Father is merciful. ~ Jesus

Mercy is the act of showing compassion or forgiveness towards someone whom it is within one’s power to punish or harm.  Insults.  Pride in one’s opinion.  We see these on both sides of the political aisle and every color of the spectrum between.  There is a bit of venom in so much of what is posted, like the intent is to harm those who disagree with us. Or the spirit is prideful, lifting ourselves up by re-convincing ourselves of what we already believe.  But where is the mercy?  Where is compassion for the journey other individuals are on?

Here’s another good quote:

For all those who exalt themselves will be humbled, and those who humble themselves will be exalted. ~ Jesus

I think this is the one that gets to me the most on social media.  So much of what I read from both sides is shared with such condescension and self-righteousness and disdain that anyone who doesn’t agree with my meme of the moment must be an idiot.  Whatever happened to a little bit of humility?  What has happened to a recognition that we are all broken and in need of saving grace?  It’s still there; I know that it is, but are we expressing it well in the ever pervasive world of social media?  Some do.  But do I whether in the virtual world or the real world?

Is this something new?  This division of “US” and “THEM” by various criteria that may not be the same criteria God uses? 

Nah, it really isn’t.  People have been doing it since the beginning.  People expected Jesus to be a political hero.  When many had heard enough to figure out that wasn’t His intent, they moved on to the next potential hero who would work to give them what they wanted: security by overturning the government which was ruled by Rome at the time.  So those who remained were the “US” and those who turned away were “THEM”.

I am old enough that I remember people deciding who were the “real” Christians by how often people were in church.  Coming on Sunday morning didn’t really count.  Coming back on Sunday nights meant you were more of a “real” Christian, but those who came on Mondays for visitation and Wednesdays for prayer meeting were even more “real” Christians.  Once you volunteered to serve somewhere in a titled position, then that was proof of your “real” Christianity.

So what we see today isn’t really anything new.  But it does seem more overt and pervasive these days since social media is available at our fingertips 24 hours a day every day of the year.  I almost never engage in comments, but I will occasionally give a “Like” so if folks cared enough to count up my likes, they could figure out where I lean.  

But is that the point?  Does this bring us together or divide us more?  Are we growing in critical thinking skills as individuals or as Americans or as Christians by all of this political posting and ranting?  Are we building bridges or walls?  I admit that I fight to not let a few “respect points” drop for the poster as I keep scrolling, while I may shake my head just a bit.  I have had the honest debate about defriending people who I usually don’t agree with, but I want to take the high road and trust that being friends or being family or being fellow Americans or being fellow Christians or - how about this crazy idea? - being fellow humans is more important than politics.  Much more important, because any house divided against itself cannot stand.  That quote is still as true today as it has been for centuries. So how do we come together as one people?  Aye, there is the real rub, the real hard conversation.  Too hard a conversation for me to answer in one little blog post, but I suspect the answer is somewhere in building bridges and not walls much like The Cross does.

It often makes me sad to scroll.  There are certain people I can count on hearing from every day or so with a political meme or joke or condescending comment, even fellow followers of Christ, that I often wonder what their answer would be if I asked them face to face, “Am I a ‘real’ Christian?”

Linen Therapy

Do you ever engage in linen therapy?  Or is it just me?

Hi there.  It's been a LONG time since I posted here.  Much has changed in the last 9 months.  We have two new grandchildren, but I have not personally met either one of them, so I can't officially introduce you to either of them here yet.  Hopefully that will get remedied in the coming week or so, at which point I will introduce you to the latest A-man and K-man.  (We now have two of each - two A-men, two O-man and two K-men....I am going to have to figure out how to distinguish them here IF I keep blogging!)  But I digress.  G acquired his CDL, so he is now driving a truck.  And I've been working more hours than I like to think about on the new job with MP.  MP is now live on SAP, but I would not say it's "pretty and smooth sailing from here on out."  I don't think we are quite the Titanic, but we are still sailing some rough seas and working long hours to avoid icebergs.

All of that to say, I haven't had the brain power or time to try and share anything here with anyone.  Nor have I been baking.  At.  All.  I get it if you've given up on me ever being a "real" blogger much less a "real" food blogger.  You would probably be right about that.  I haven't really even taken many pictures lately, so obviously, I will never "think" like a "real" blogger.  Sigh...

Other than a few days around Christmas, this weekend has been the first time "off" I've had.  My sister, J, came in town for the first time in at least two years, since she hadn't gotten to meet Lady L before now.  So A, B and C also came in town.  But did I get a whole bunch of pictures?  Nope.  All I got was this one...at least there are three cuties in this pic, and you can see a couple of Mickey Mouse pancakes on plates, so I can still recognize "cuteness" when I see it, and I almost "baked" again this weekend, right?  And yes, Lady L made sure that the pic was all about her shoe.  Her daddy and her Auntie PK would be so proud.

But then everyone left a little while ago.  After three rainy days in this rather small house with two to three toddlers, not much sleep, lots of new experiences with cousins, a few toddler meltdowns and a whole lot of hugs and kisses, everyone left.  And the house was quiet again.  Back to too quiet again perhaps.

Which takes me to linen therapy.  I bought some new towels a couple of days ago.  I like new towels, soft, thick towels - the nicest I feel like I can afford.  Plus I bought some new kitchen linens.  I'd put all of the new towels through laundry, but I had not necessarily put the kitchen towels away.  I'd just laid them around on the sides of baskets for the weekend, but with everyone gone, I sat down in front of the kitchen cabinet where I keep kitchen linens and sorted things out.

And it was therapeutic.

I saw the Christmas kitchen towels and hot pads that came from Grandma N when she broke up housekeeping to move into the retirement villa.

I saw the old trivet that used to be on my mom's table.

I saw the hot pads that were made for us by Grandpa R's father, both of whom are now gone.

I saw the dish cloths crocheted for us by the widow of one of G's cousins. J is a sweet lady, who loves to make these cloths and give them to people.  The last ones she gave us, she handed to us at the end of Aunt M's memorial service.  Since we lost G's Aunt M a couple of years ago, we haven't been back to Southern Illinois, so I'm not sure if/when we will see J again.  But I have a few linens to make me think of her when we use them.

I saw the towel that a friend from VJ embroidered for me with "Deb's Kitchen" on it along with the sweet card she gave me at the time.  I know I'm supposed to use this towel, but it's so pretty, I can't quite bring myself to use it for anything other than decorating a basket or something like that.

I, of course, also saw cloths that needed to be turned into dust rags or whatever, and there is a certain therapy that comes from just straightening a cabinet or closet, But the real therapy came from holding and touching things given to me/us through the years by others who have either passed on or that I do not see regularly any more.  And I cried a little.  I cry again as I type this.

Cause time moves on.  Life doesn't last forever this side of heaven.  And visits are short.  And people are the best gifts we get here on earth.

Crazy what a few linens can make a lady think about....

Happy! Happy! Birthday Boy K!

This handsome fellow turns 30 today!

K has been in our lives for about 6-ish years.  I forget exactly when he came into our lives, but S&K have been married for almost 5 years now. They were together at least a year before that wonderful day, but K fits so nicely into our family that I forget when he first joined.  And that's a good thing!  A very good thing indeed!  

We love you K!  Here are 5 things that you have taught me - and it's hard to choose only 5, since you have taught me quite a bit!

5 - Find the fun and humor in everything.  And I do mean everything.  

Whether that is recalling that Jacks in the Box are everywhere...

...or tending bar with a special panache and  flair...

4 - How to build a train.  Or at least how to build a cake that looks like a train.

That was such fun!  Here is a link to that progress story...good times!

3 - Remember the "good ol' days".

Trains.  Preserving military vehicles.  Restoring cars.  Old guns.  The list is way longer than phone booths.  History.  Remember it.

2 - When your wife needs a farmhouse table to seat "everyone", build it for her.

And # 1 - Teach.  K isn't "officially" a teacher of anyone or any subject.  Doesn't matter.  K is a natural.  And he is always teaching simply by living and sharing.  K has a love for learning that runs deep.  And it is contagious, because he makes learning FUN!  I have lost count of the number of times K has devoted free weekends to attending historical events, re-enactments, festivals and parades to share living history with anyone who will listen, learn and experience.  And I have no doubt that all who have taken the time to interact with K have gained much in knowledge and joy and fun.  And that - my friends - is the sign of a true teacher.

Yep, we love you K!  We hope you have a WONDERFUL birthday, and we look forward to sharing your 30's with you!  Happy!  Happy!

Endings and Beginnings

I have been writing the last few pages of a chapter in my life the last couple of weeks.  This has been a long chapter, lasting almost 18 years.  That's pretty much a lifetime - birth to graduating from high school type lifetime years.

As of about 3pm tomorrow, I will no longer be an employee of VJ.  I will be short of 18 years by 12 days when I walk out of the exit interview tomorrow. 

That has felt so surreal since I made the decision last Monday.

I have accepted a new position with a company I will heretofore call MP in Chesterfield to help them with their SAP implementation.  They are going live in January with the latest version of SAP, so this is a wonderful learning opportunity. 

It is also a scary opportunity.  It is a chance for me to spread my wings and take what I've learned at VJ and apply it someplace else. 

I may fly. 

I may flop.

But I won't know if I don't try.  And I don't want to get to the end of my career and look back and wonder if I could have done it.  So I'm trying to move past the fear - with God's help and the help of wonderful encouraging words from so many - and starting at a new company on Monday. 

This is good news!  I know it is good news! 

Yet at the same time... tears.  I was crying big time when I wrote out my letter of resignation.  I could not have spoken what I wanted to say to the two men who saw something in me that I didn't see in myself.  These two men changed my life, and the opportunity I have before me now would not be possible without the two of them.  Thinking of that now brings the tears again.  How do you thank people for changing your life for the good?  Somehow the coconut cream pie and pumpkin swirl cheesecake that I brought them as peace offerings just didn't seem to suffice.

And then I was fine with the tears. 

Until today.

When wonderful people surprised me with a "This Is Your VJ Life" party.

When I heard voices I hadn't heard in years.

When I heard stories of dead fish and emails and crashing the system and work associates who have become friends.

When I listened to words of appreciation from folks I've worked closely enough with that they know where the bodies are buried and could have told those stories but chose not to. 

When I hugged the receptionist that holds the building and all of us together and who may never decide to retire.

Yep, endings.  Closing a chapter.  Turning the page and starting to write a new one. 

I simply want to acknowledge this moment.  So many people have taught me so much as I wrote this last chapter.  More than I could ever thank, but to whom I will always be grateful. 

And who I will always treasure.

You know who you are.  Thank you.

Happy! Happy! Birthday Girl Aunt FB!

This beautiful lady is celebrating her birthday today!

 

If you read this post from June when my Aunt R had a birthday, you may recall two things:

• We do not reveal a lady's age
• I did the math to at least say that Aunt R was turning "something north of 70"

 

Now since Aunt FB is two years older than Aunt R, we can therefore say that Aunt FB is turning something north of 70 + 2.  And that's all I'm going to say about that.

 

Aunt FB is one of The Original Eight.  She is the lady standing third from the left, between my mother and Aunt R.  I miss the faces in this photo....

 

 

We had a GREAT visit with these two aunts and many of their kiddos and grand kiddos last month!  It was so good to see everyone and capture some of their stories. 

 

So today, I get to share with you 5 things that I have learned from Aunt FB.  I'm not sure that she will even know that I posted it to be able to read it, but hopefully someone will read it to her somewhere, someway, someday...

 

So here they are - 5 things that I have learned Aunt FB.

 

5) Embrace the nickname!  No shame!  Even if the nickname ceased to truly apply past toddlerhood. 



4) Oreos make the world go round.  Always have.  Always will.

(And if I recall correctly, I believe that Aunt FB has received at least one birthday "cake" made of Oreos similar to this pic.)

 

3) Create beauty.  My Aunt FB loves to create beauty wherever she can.  I’m not sure that she does this any longer, but when I was growing up, every family bride was given some painted china.  It might be a cup; it might be a plate or a saucer, but it was hand-painted by Aunt FB.  Each one individual.  Each one special.  Each one beautiful.  Each one fragile – not only because of the medium, but because of the time and creativity and love from the giver.  This cross was done by Aunt FB for my daughter, B.  One of a kind.

2) Write.  I think at least part of my love to write comes from my Aunt FB.  Tell stories.  Don’t worry about being “good enough.”  Just write.  The very, regular practice will make me better.  (And THAT’S the part I struggle with the most!  Sigh…)

 

1) Teach.  Share your knowledge and experience with others.  I’m not sure if she is still teaching every week or not, but I know she was teaching from the Bible every week (except vacations and illness) well into her “something north of 70 + 2”.  And teaching well.  Aunt FB has touched many lives through the years with her words of teaching, wisdom, love and compassion.  Her reward will be great in Heaven.

 

Happy!  Happy!  Aunt FB!!  We love you and hope you have had a wonderful birthday full of love and laughter and fun and Oreos!!

 

 

 

 

Happy! Happy! Birthday Girl C!

It's C's birthday today - of C&D fame!  Happy!  Happy!

 

While I haven't known C all that long, I've learned at least these 5 things from her...hope these bring a smile, Miss C!

 

 

5) Sponge Bob.  Cause Sponge Bob.  I couldn't find a pic of the SB cake I made last year for B's 2nd birthday to show you here...too many changes with laptops and files and whatnot...but I've learned a bit about SB just from making him on a cake.

 

 

4) Live in pajamas every chance you get.  (I don’t get many chances, but when I do – like working from home on snow days – I get it.)



3) PBJ’s and chili go together like grilled cheese and tomato soup or hot dogs and mac & cheese.  I haven’t tried the PBJ-Chili combo platter yet, but C&D swear by it.  And they are apparently not alone if this blog is any indication… http://alexsedibles.blogspot.com/2011/01/only-way-to-eat-chili.html 

2) Love unconditionally.  It won’t always be reciprocated.  Love unconditionally anyway.

1) Motherhood is the most honorable profession and privilege, regardless of the circumstances.  Certain situations make it harder than others, but choosing to give the gift of life is always worth it.

 

Happy!  Happy!  C!  We hope you've had a wonderful birthday and that we get to see everyone again soon!

We love you!