# 5 - Giving is good; receiving is hard

The Top 10 Things I've Learned in My 50 years on this planet...

# 10 - Don't sweat the small stuff

#   9 - Being mean blows chunks

#   8 - You can't reason with the unreasonable

#   7 - I need quiet

#   6 - Life is unpredictable; change is constant

#   5- Giving is good; receiving is hard

 

That first part is a pretty simple truth, I know.  That second part maybe not so much.  Few people actually articulate that receiving is hard.  I want to talk about the second part first and then the first part.  Cause I want to end this post on an extravagantly positive note.  Just wait...

 

I have experience with receiving being hard.  I'm not talking about receiving Christmas gifts or birthday presents or wedding gifts.  That sort of receiving is easy and fun, celebrating life and joyous occasions. 

 

I'm talking about receiving when you need to receive - when you really don't have another choice but to receive as a result of asking for help or because someone sees the need in your life and gives. 

 

It could be tangible gifts like money or food or paying a bill. 

 

It could also be intangible gifts like a listening ear or a well-timed bit of humor.

 

Or giving you rides when your eyesight is failing.  Such is the case for my ex-mother-in-law.  She has wet macular degeneration in both eyes, and is no longer able to drive.  She has loving friends who are happy to pick her up to go to church or to have her hair done or go out to eat.  But it's still hard for her to be in a position of receiving. 

 

I get that.  As a single mother of 4 children with no child support from their father, I have had lots of experience swallowing my pride and receiving.  And it's hard. 

 

But it's also good.  For both the giver and the receiver.  For truth be told, we all need help from time to time.  Some more than others due to various life circumstances, but the bottom line is that none of us is beyond needing help.  We may not always recognize the need, but we all need help.  So learning how to receive, though hard, is a good thing.

 

Now for that first part.  Giving is good.  Giving is fun!  Giving can be easy.  Giving is one of the truest expressions of love.  You can give without love, but I dare you to love without giving.  If you try to do it, you'll inevitably kill the love.  And that's just sad.  And a waste of a good dare.  Just embrace it and give!

 

Like this lady.  I am about to show you a picture of one of the wedding gifts given to my daugher last month. I don't have a good camera, so it's not going to begin to do this gift justice, but I share it, because it is just about the ultimate in extravagant giving.  Are you ready?  Here is a pic of the whole.  As good as this is, just wait...keep reading...it gets better...

Pretty amazing, huh? If you have ever quilted or known anyone who has you have a sense of the time it took to do this. 

But that's not all.  Here's a shot of some of the details.

This lady's got skills.  Mad skills.  My sister quilts, but even she looked at the giver and asked if her mother could give her lessons.  Did you catch that?  The giver was not the maker.  The giver was my daughter's roommate in college, so they had spent lots of time together.  But the maker was her mother.  She may have spent a total of a mere few hours with my daughter, but she invested 10 times that amount at least, making every detail right.  Even down to small touches of orange, since S used to be into orange when she was in college.

Talk about extravagant!  Talk about giving!  This is the kind of giving that inspires me.  I want to give like this when I grow up! 

 

Because giving is good.  Especially giving like this - from a heart of love and joy and sheer excellence.  Giving the best that you are and have to another.  Wow.  That's just about as cool as it gets.